The Legend of The Sharwahl
The Sharwahl is a legendary aquatic creature that rules the deep seas of the Arctic Circle. A rare cross between a basking shark and a narwhal, only one sharwahl has been confirmed to exist, in the Barents Sea. Marine biologists theorize that nuclear testing by the Soviet Union at nearby Novaya Zemlya in the late 1950’s irradiated the seawater, and resulted in the only confirmed instance of a shark mating with a narwhal. The sharwahl has an elongated tusk, like its parent ‘unicorn of the sea’ narwhal, as well as sharks’ teeth with which it consumes its prey.
The earliest known references to the sharwahl exist in the Atlantean texts, with subsequent references in the Book of Lilith and the Dead Sea scrolls. However, the sharwahl was considered for centuries to be a mythological creature.
The sharwahl was unofficially discovered off the coast of Svalbard in the Barents Sea by eccentric explorer Sharnovon “Shark” Wahlberg in 1969. However, since he had no photographic evidence to confirm his sighting, the Norwegian sailors of Svalbard dismissed his sighting as a mere hallucination, which was a known characteristic of Sharnovon’s.
In the years that followed, stories of the sharwahl were passed from generation to generation, its existence questioned by some but lauded by those who had heard the stories firsthand.
In 1991, the fishing boat Andrea Gail set out on an expedition with the purpose of capturing the elusive sharwahl. However, the boat sank shortly after sighting the sharwahl, tragically taking the lives of its crew. A subsequent sharwahl search expedition by the S.S. Mojo was mired by confusion when its navigational equipment and crew were affected by the Aurora Borealis.
After decades of ridicule and institutionalization, Sharnovon became determined to prove to the world that the sharwahl did indeed exist. After several meetings with the producers of the Sharknado movie series in 2018, Sharnovon “Shark” Wahlberg was officially confirmed to be the star and executive producer of the proposed film “Sharknado 7: Revenge Of The Sharwahl”.
After months of filming on location in the frigid Barents Sea in the winter of 2018, Sharnovon and the filming crew located the sharwahl off the coast of Kongsoya Island. The sharwahl was lured in by the scent of Sharnovon’s blood, as he dipped overboard his foot which had been pierced by a nail on the boat days before.
During an ill-advised scene in which the script called for Sharnovon to ride the sharwahl while rescuing Tara Reid, Sharnovon was impaled by the sharwahl’s tusk while attempting to mount it, and he died instantly.
Sharnovon’s only known heirs and relatives, distant nephews Mark and Donnie, sued the producers of the Sharknado movie series for negligence in Sharnovon’s wrongful death. The magistrate granted all rights and royalties for the Sharknado movies to the Wahlberg brothers, and decreed that no further Sharknado movies will ever be made.
The sharwahl was reportedly not harmed in the filming. It was last seen retreating deep underwater with Reid still attached, and has not been seen since. However, the legend of the sharwahl continues to grow.
On December 1, 2018, the Tibetan monks of K’un-Lun decreed that the year 2019 will be known on the Chinese calendar as “The Year of the Sharwahl.”